Mourning the Destruction (Article #51) 8/2/2007

As planned, Goldie joined a group who went to tour, but most importantly to support, the people of the city of Sderot. As you must be aware, the city of Sderot has been the target of unending Kassam rocket attacks from the Gaza area. Without any strategic assets (industrial, military, etc.) to protect or significant casualties absorbed, the government’s attitude has been to publicly decry the attacks yet not take a strong stand in defending against them.

I must admit that I myself have no idea how we could greater defend the people and the area. The army does target launchers and terrorists when it can identify them and it is certainly difficult to capture/attack fighters who wear no uniforms and blend in with the populace. However, from a layman’s point of view and in the opinions of many people on the street, there should be more done – even if we can’t say precisely what it is.

No matter how you approach the problem, the facts are that the town of Sderot bears the brunt of the rocket attacks. While rarely deadly, the neverending rocket firings have traumatized the city and its residents, forcing them into a “bunker mentality” type of existence. I cannot personally imagine being strong enough to live under the same conditions as those who remain n Sderot. We are therefore honored to participate in programs such as the challa program that helps support the bakery there.

Goldie especially feels an obligation to do as much as we can for the people who are under attack simply because they are convenient and they are Jews. When the opportunity arose to go to Sderot and see things firsthand while supporting the people there, she jumped at it – although with comcern in the back of her mind.

The tiyul was organized by Standing Together, an organization that’s goals are to support our soldiers and reach out to Israelis under attack. The participants were brought to Sderot to see what was going on there, but also to shop in Sderot stores (providing them with much needed revenue in in light of the exodus of many of their customers from the city) and show the people of Sderot that someone cares about them.

She convinced our daughter Chaya to go with her, even though Chaya was very worried about her safety and was not that enthused about the trip in general.

When they got to Sderot, they were given a quick drill in what to do in the event of a rocket attack. Things like, “Stay low” or “just knock on any door and they will let you into their bomb shelter”. The direction of Gaza was pointed out and they were told to keep a building between themselves and the rockets and to stay low in case they couldn’t get to a shelter.

This definitely spooked Goldie, who called me to tell me how the danger of the situation really hit home at that moment. Although she quickly adjusted, that moment’s and understanding of how real the situation was really hit home for her.

They toured a Gan (preschool) where the kids indoor area is a bomb shelter so that they can maintain their regular schedule throughout the day, went shopping in some local stores, visited a home that had been hit a couple of days earlier by a rocket (the residents of the house had ignored 2 prior air raid sirens but decided to go to the shelter only for the 3rd one and were in the shelter for a mere few seconds when the rocket crashed into their home), had lunch in a local Yeshiva and heard about the conditions from the Rosh Yeshiva and then returned home with a brief stop back at the damaged home, where a Standing Together representative presented the owners with a cash gift that the bus passengers had quickly put together in sympathy and concern.

Goldie was definitely glad that she went and had the chance to do what she could. Chaya’s reaction was the most gratifying. After spending the day in Sderot, she turned to Goldie on the bus and said, “Thank you for making me go today-- what a meaningful day”

Less than a week later we mourned a different destruction with the coming of Tisha B’Av. The Friday before the fast we had gone to the Kotel as a family. Batya had mentioned that it had been a long time since we had gone to the Kotel, and we decided that if it was important enough for her to mention it, it was important enough for us to go.

Similar to last year, I was somewhat awestruck by the fact that we are now living what we only imagined in years past. We were able to walk along the site of the Bet HaMikdash and see the physical evidence of the destruction by the Romans. We could internalize and (in a very limited way) actually visualize a very tiny fraction of what we are now lacking.

I resolved to go to the Kotel for Mincha (afternoon prayers) on Erev Tisha B’Av (the day before Tisha B’Av), so that I could be at the Kotel as near to Tisha B’Av as possible and put myself in the right frame of mind for the fast and its’ tefillot (prayers). Although it was a very hot day (it seems as if the entire summer has been a very hot day), I followed through on my plan and returned home.

That night, as I made my way to Shul for davening, I passed a van driven by Gedalia Borvick who was apparently picking up a couple of our neighbors to go to the Kotel for davening. When they asked, "We have room for one more - want to join us at the Kotel for Eichah?"

“Want to? Of course”, I responded.

I cannot tell you how unbelievable it is to be in our holy city on a day such as Tisha B'av. A day in which we remind ourselves that we have been put into exile partly because we could not get along with each other is the same day in which we set aside our differences and gently, join with other Jews without reservation. Sfardim, Chassidim, Yeshivalite, Modern people - EVERYONE came together in a single night to mourn our collective loss.

We got there an hour after the normal davening time, yet people continued to come to the Kotel. it was hard to find a spot for us all to sit together and the sounds of Eicha and Kinnot from the sephardic nusach (cantillations) to chassidish to our own ashkenazi filled our ears as we made our way into the plaza. We made our own minyan and davened together, reading Eicha for ourselves and then said the kinnot nice and slowly, THERE IN THE EXACT SPOT WHERE THE DESTRUCTIONS TOOK PLACE!! How could I not be awed and overwhelmed.

I felt a true connection to H-shem and knew that it is him in his great kindness that delivered the perfect ride at the perfect time for me to benefit from such an experience. I was reminded that this is a major part of why we are here. Because we can visit the Kotel whenever we want.

The next day when I added the special tefilla of Nachem in my davening, imagine how much more meaningful such an experience was when I was just there! “Please H-shem rebuild our holy city and the Bet Hamikdash!”

I was actually a little concerned afterward. I worried that I should not have “enjoyed” myself so much on a day in which we are supposed to feel the deepest mourning for what we have lost. I can only hope that the “pleasure” I had in being able to so personally feel the destruction was interpreted as my way of having the proper mindframe and attitude for the day.