Back to School (Article #20) 9/14/2006

The kids began what is sure to be our Israeli educational adventure on Sunday. The school year actually began a couple of days late this year; many of the schools in Central and Southern Israel had been turned into temporary shelters for the people of Northern Israel who had fled their homes in the face of the Hizbullah Katyusha onslaught.

The communities really opened their houses and their hearts to the Northerners, yet there we so many of them that needed accommodations that it became necessary to use the school building for them as well. With the cessation of active hostilities, the schools emptied and the government announced a late start to the school year to give the schools an extra day or two to prepare their buildings for the new year.

We had been told that the school day in Israel is much shorter than that in America and that we would have our kids home a lot more than usual. I guess that Beit Shemesh is different than other communities; our kids’ normal school schedule runs from around 8 AM to 3:30 PM (for Mordechai, Batya and Aliza) or 4:45 PM (Chaya) four days a week, 1 PM on Tuesdays and Noon Fridays (with the exception of Chaim whose High School starts Minyan at 7:30 and ends three days at 8 PM and twice at 6).

When we heard that the first day of school was a half day, with a noontime dismissal, we weren’t surprised. For years, the schools they went to in America also started with a half day on the first day, following their normal school schedule only from day two of school and onward.

Goldie has signed the kids up for various Chugim (after school activities) on the days they get out early, and we were prepared for them to finally get out of the house and be in school all day. They returned from their first half day excited to have gone (for the most part) and bearing various notes from their teachers telling us the school schedule for the near future.

I’m not sure why, but it takes at least a week for the kids to go to their full schedule, with the High Schools (3 days) and Preschools (2 days) being the quickest to ramp up, and the Elementary Schools bringing up the rear (no clue – we are STILL on an abbreviated schedule).

Many of the notes home are sent in Hebrew only. We have to focus when reading them, and often need assistance in translating some of the words. We also have to work hard in translating the text and work book homework assignment, since their instructions are also exclusively Hebrew.

There are so many other issues that we face in dealing with school. Many of them are language based.

Moshe (19 months) goes to a private Gan/daycare so that Goldie can attend Ulpan. He had some separation issues in parting from Goldie at dropoff, but by day three – he was fine. He is having the easiest transition so far and we have even caught him using Hebrew words for toys and other playthings.

Mordechai (age 5) goes to Gan Chova (Pre1a?) in a building down the block from us. He speaks very little Hebrew and was terrified to go to school the first day. He had a lot of worries about the Morah understanding him, and his ability to interact with the other kids.

The first few days were awful for him (and us too). He definitely has had a very hard adjustment to school. We can see how scared he is to go to school and how it affects his behavior all day. No matter how many times we hear that this is “normal” and that he will adjust very quickly to the new school and new language, we worry – it’s our job.

He told us that he sits patiently when the Morah reads a story and that he can’t play with most of the boys, since they don’t understand English. Yet, he has made a couple of new friends, and has expressed interest in playing with them outside of school. Even though he clearly misses his friends (more on that later), he seemed to be a little more contented at the end of the week, although it could simply be that he learned to be more patient and less upset.

Batya (age 7) and Aliza (age 10) were assigned buddies by their school. A buddy is a student who speaks both Hebrew and English and sits next to the Oleh student. They have permission to talk during class, translating what the teacher is saying to their “buddy”.

In theory this is a great idea. In practice it doesn’t work so well. If the buddies take a minute to translate the lesson piece by piece, they miss hearing what the teacher is saying while they are busy translating. So the buddies often wait until the lesson is complete before attempting to translate. This leaves a lot of information that needs to be given over, and the translations are usually lacking key points.

While Aliza is only marginally frustrated by this since she is just plain happy to be here, Batya struggles with this. Both of them are highly motivated to learn and really want to work hard to please themselves, their teachers and their parents. So it is very tough for Batya to come home each day to tell us, “I learned nothing today, I didn’t understand anything.”

The first few days she also came home telling us that she had no one to play with during recess. She is a really slow eater and by the time she finishes her snack or sandwhich, the other kids are already engrossed in a game or activity and she is left out.

As a parent, this is very difficult to hear from your child. We explained to Batya that she can join the game AND eat her snack at the same time, and then we (Goldie) called the school to speak with the Yoetzet and see what could be done (we are still working on it).

The Yoetzet is the person whose function within the school is to be an advocate for Olim and their children within the school system. This person is an English speaker and can often help navigate the unfamiliar territory for new immigrant families, of which we are one. They are there for us to call upon when we need help.

Of course, since the Yoetzet was not going to be in for the rest of the week, we will have to wait a bit to get things in order. This should not really be a surprise since it seems that a prevalent attitude here is, “We’ll take care of it right away – some time next week.”

Aliza actually had a great week, even though she was clueless at school. Even though she has no idea what is going on in the classroom, she is old enough to be able to make homework “dates’ with other s, so she ends up learning the material eventually. But the big news of the week was regarding her chug.

Aliza was originally going to do only a dance chug once a week after school. She then heard about auditions for a play being put on in the winter and asked us if she could try out. Out of 200 s, she was one of 20 to get a call back for a second audition and one of 9 to be awarded a part. She was thrilled when she got the call, and we are really proud of her.

Chaya (age 13) has begun to make more friends and is slowly getting more comfortable with living in Sheinfeld instead of Ramat Beit Shemesh. She is also having language issues at school. This is compounded by the fact that the curriculum here is much different than we had in America, especially Math.

The Israeli education system has many weaknesses and is VERY different from what we are used to. They have large class sizes and are often short on resources. There is a tendency to avoid dealing with special needs children. Yet, they do seem to have a much stronger emphasis on introducing advanced math at a younger age.

She has no idea what is going on in many subjects, but we had hoped that Math is universal and would therefore be easier. For homework, Chaya’s Ninth Grade class was reviewing the material they covered last year, and when Chaim saw the material he told us that it was the same math he learned last year in Ninth Grade.

We were told to expect this, but it is still a shock to hear that we need to get her a tutor to augment her education simply because the curriculum in Israel advances much quicker than the one in America. Hopefully she will catch up quickly so that she can feel accomplished and capable of participating in Math discussions.

Chaim (age 15) seems to be content. As the first kid to speak about his desire to return to the US, we were concerned that he may have major adjustment issues. However, he has told us several times that although he wants to go back to Americe, he is happy in his current school and we can clearly see that he has made friends with several of the local kids from other schools.

Goldie (age – no way) is also a student for the next six months. She started Ulpan on Sunday and is really working very hard to learn the language.

Originally assessed as a good speaker with very little confidence in her ability to speak. She was assigned to the third level class (out of four – YAY GOLDIE). She initially thought that level was too easy, and moved to level four. However, after she saw the amount of homework assigned to that class, she decided to give her old class a second chance (with 6 kids, staying in the harder homework is impractical).

I feel bad for Goldie. She is spread so thin. She takes Ulpan four morning a week. She has to be at every meeting in the school for each kid. She has to shop and take care of the house. She has to run all our household errands. She has to help with homework. She has to be in the house for each repairman, installer, vendor or whomever needs to get into the house and fix something. And much much more………………….

She has so many different things to worry about in getting things set up at home. On top of all of that, we had not had online access until this week, so she is very far behind in her work which also creates a lot of stress for her.

She is really working hard to make things go smoothly and I admire her for that. She has displayed patience and caring whenever things go wrong and has been very committed to keeping us all happy.

On Tuesday we had a handyman come in and install some hanging rods into the master bedroom closet (the only real closet in the house). On Thursday we got most of our Aronot (closets) delivered. One of them arrived damaged and will hopefully be replaced this week. It is nice to have our clothes hanging in closets instead of on the shower rods, yet another sign that we are settling in.

Goldie and I enjoyed our first “kid-free” Friday. We had a chance to go shopping together to buy things for the house and unpack a bunch of boxes. We also had a chance to sit together to talk about the upcoming week a bit and plan.

Our niece Tova joined us for Shabbat. She is in the Shaalvim s Shana Bet (second year) program in Yerushalayim. She had been in Israel for about a week, and it was nice to have her sit with the kids, especially Moshe, to give us a breather.

On Friday night I was talking with Mordechai about my upcoming trip to America. After his rough week at school, Mordechai was highly stressed and went into “meltdown.” After the Seudah he and I were laying together on the couch while he cried.

“What’s the matter?” I asked. His response, “I want to go with you to America and play with my friends!” He really had a rough week and is missing his old surroundings.

However, these issues are not unique to the Katz family. Many Olim face similar issues and have to deal with language, housing and other problems as much or more than we do. Many of our issues resolved themselves or will take adjustment for us to cope. And we will adjust.

On Motzei Shabbat we went to a special event at the shul. By the time you read this, I will have left – but I was originally scheduled to leave to America on Sat. night. However, our shul ran a special program to meet and greet the new residents/members. In order to attend the event (and save some money), I postponed my departure about ten hours.

At the event, the shul ran a “speed dating” style game. Each couple was given two index cards and told to pair up with another couple with whom who they had not yet shared a Shabbat meal. They were given index cards and a pencil and told to get as much information about the couple that they could in five minutes. At the end of each round a buzzer was sounded and couples were asked to find knew partners for another round.

After a few rounds, couples were randomly asked to introduce one of the couples that they had “dated” to the rest of the crowd and give the crown as much info about them that they had noted during the dating round.

It was a fun event, and we learned a lot about our neighbors. I stayed up most of the rest of the night and packed for my trip to NY the next morning. Ten days away from home, running around NY and Chicago trying to meet alumni, parents, donors and get things done.

As my first trip back since making Aliyah, I am wondering what it will feel like.